Married Life: One Month In...A Lifetime to Go!

Ryan and I have officially been married one month today! I’m still shocked! What a month it has been! To this day we still ask each other if we’re actually married to each other. How funny is that? I think the both of us were in a place of doubt when it came to us one day being married, more specifically to each other. I just wanted to reminisce on how we actually got here...

When Ryan and I met 9 years ago, I was in such a weird space. I was still trying to get over a breakup that had taken place almost three years prior to us meeting. How crazy is that? It’s true. I had given up on ever giving my heart to someone else and even trusting myself with anyone. That’s the downside to heartbreak and even moving into places that God hasn’t called you to be in. You end up lost, confused, and in need of some serious help. 

At the time I had met Ryan, I had been in a single state for 6 months. I had just made up my mind that I was going to “wait” for the right guy to enter my life so I wouldn’t have to deal with the drama of heartbreak. I knew I wanted to be in a relationship that was serious and heading somewhere. After we met, and after talking to a friend at the time, I decided to let myself be open to love once again. It wasn’t an easy road, but one that would one day lead us down the aisle towards forever. Six months into the relationship, as fresh as it was, Ryan was already looking at rings to propose. I told him to slow it down. I was like woah! This man wants to marry me?! Even though I knew I loved him and most importantly he was different compared to everyone else, I felt we needed more time. 

So ladies, it doesn’t take a man years to know whether or not he wants to spend forever and a day with you. They will know immediately. Despite the fact that we married 9 years after meeting...it happened when it was time. Honestly, if it happened before now...I don’t know where we would be. We both had a lot of growing up to do. I’m glad we got married when we did.

Fast forward three years (into our relationship), I found myself single again. How funny is that? During that time I knew that I really wanted to get married and that I had first get myself together. During my single season (3 years), I spent time praying strategically praying for my husband. At that moment I didn’t have a clue as to who he was. I just trusted God for a husband. I saw that movie War Room and went to war. Lol. I wrote a prayer down and I said that prayer for my husband almost everyday, along with prayers for other areas of my life. I prayed for my in-laws, my future children, my business, my family, my finances, my giftings, you name it...I prayed for it. I had a wall full of written prayers that I prayed out loud in prayer after I prayed for other things. To some that may seem crazy, but it works. God answered the prayers I had for myself and my husband. He’s still working the prayer our in real time, but I know he answered my prayer. Has all of those prayers I prayed been answered? No, but I do know if He answered this one, He’ll answer those when it’s time. Praying in that manner not only strengthened my faith, but silenced my unbelief. I didn’t have much time to be consumed with doubt, I was too busy praying.

Let me clarify, I didn’t beg and plead with God to send me my husband. You know how we do. I prayed for his life. I prayed for him to be a man who walked with God who could lead our family. I prayed for him being a father to our children. I prayed a prayer of faith. Despite the fact I didn’t know who he was, or if he actually existed...I prayed for him as if he existed in my life as of Now.  

I’ve heard Ciara (who married Russell Wilson) state how she prayed for her husband and he showed up. Lol. Women have gone crazy trying to determine what she actually prayed. It honestly doesn’t matter. What matters is that she got busy praying. This has been the testimony of so many other women, I’m just coming up behind them to be a witness. The scripture is true...God will give you the desires of your heart if you delight yourself in Him. Plain and Simple. True enough, those desires must be Godly desires, but my desire to be married was just that. 

Ryan and I have grown closer this past month and I pray that we continue to grow closer as we grow closer to God. You know, I want us to have a nice home, have nice careers, be successful, have a fat bank account so we don’t have to struggle, have healthy beautiful children, and I would love for us to travel the world. All of that means nothing without God. 

No marriage advice...nothing I’ve learned in a month...just taking one day at a time and enjoying them as they happen. 

One Month Down...A Lifetime to Go! Cheers to Forever!

-XO Kelly Nicole

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